Monday, April 19, 2010

A Day Like the First

Today we were cautiously optimistic going into Cash's MRI. He hasn't been digressing since chemo started and we were seeing positive improvements in a few of his symptoms.

Unfortunately the results of the MRI were not positive - the tumor has increased in size. I don't have the MRI pics but we saw a side by side from the first MRI until now and it's approximately 5mm larger. They are concerned it could start inhibiting the fluid in the brain - the tumor board meets Wednesday to look at it in more detail but I believe they will suggest stopping chemo and starting radiation.

I immediately got on the phone and we're trying to make preparations to get to MD Anderson in Houston, TX so we can start proton beam therapy. I trust the Lord will continue to open the doors for us so I can take Cash there very soon.

We were thankful my mom and dad, brothers and their wives came down for support and I even convinced my youngest brother, Josh, to cut his hair (it didn't take much). Here are before and after pics - he officially joined the 'Cuts for Cash' club:

The only way I can compare the emotions of being told his tumor is growing is similar to the first day we found out he had a tumor (and I thought we'd not have to re-live that ever).  But, with all of those emotions (fear, sadness, anxiety, etc), both Wendi and I still are filled with the Fruit of the Spirit: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, and Faith (Galations 5:22-23). 

I can't explain except that the Holy Spirit gives us those attributes, especially in trying times and I thought of Job this evening, who, "...in all this Job did not sin or charge God with wrong." (Job 1: 22).  We continue to lean on God and trust that His will is done in Cash's life.  While we desperately love Cash, God loves him much more than I can ever imagine - Cash is in His hands and those are amazingly powerful and loving hands. 

We continue to pray for healing and that God's will is done - Thank you for your support and prayers, we need them now more than ever.

20 comments:

  1. This was a hard post to read. It was certainly NOT the news any of us hoped or prayed to read today, and my heart has just sunk to the floor. I'm so very sorry, you guys. It doesn't seem fair or stand to reason. He's fighting so hard, as are you. **Big sigh and even more tears** I guess it's another reminder, as you say so wisely, Jack, that God is in control, not us. And more reason to trust HIM, even when trusting seems sooooo hard. I continue to pray for his miraculous intervention. Bird-dog those doctors in Houston, Jack (as you are I'm sure). If Jason can be of any help in any way (hospital connections, etc.), just say the word. Wendi--if you need me for anything during the birth of Kingston, I'm here: house cleaning, Jack Jr. watching, whatever you'd like. Lots of love, Sarah

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  2. I'm so sorry to hear the discouraging news. Your faith continues to amaze me. Hang in there. God performs miracles every day...He commands us, "Be strong and of good courage. Do not be afraid nor dismayed because the Lord our God is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9

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  3. Jack and Wendi, our hearts are so heavy for you right now. We wish there was something we could do or say, but for now we will pray for peace and the strength to face each new day and decision. Hold on tight to each other and to your wonderful family! Never lose hope, God doesn't need chemo to heal Cash.
    We are only a phone call away if there is anything we can do for you.
    Ryan and Sara Brink

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  4. I feel so overwhelmed for you guys. Your faith is outstanding and a true testament to your character and devotion to God. Robb and I will be praying for you.
    Kelly Ellis

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  5. Discouraging news, and not what we all were hoping for. I am, however, encouraged to hear of God's faithfulness in bearing your family up in this, and we can all take comfort in the fact that this doesn't come as a surprise or a discouragement to Him who holds us all in the palm of His hands, knows every hair (or lack of them) on our heads, and as you said so well, Jack, loves Cash more than we can ever comprehend. Will continue to pray fervently.

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  6. Jack & Wendi...we are so sorry to hear this news today. "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13
    We continually pray for healing in Cash's little body, strength for him and both of you, and for peace and continued trust in God. Please let us know if there is anything, at all, that we can do to help you guys. Hugs & kisses to both your adorable little boys. We love all of you so much!
    Constantly praying....Kyle & Jenny

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  7. Jack & Wendi...........Heavy hearts this morning. We know God is in control, but this is so sad..We love you all and continuing praying in God's name.
    Love,
    Tia Margie and Uncle Manuel

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  8. Jackie and Wendi...my heart hurts for you even more. We must trust in God, that Cash is under his wing.....we are all here for you...anything that we can do. Please just ask. We will continue to pray for your precious family. Love you to pieces...Auntie Ine

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  9. I got your blog from a friend. I'm so sorry to hear about this set back. Like you said, God loves Cash more then you can even imagine as he loves you. Phil 4: 6-7 says: Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. I have you all lifted up in prayer. May God lay his healing hand on Cash and give you peace through all of this.

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  10. We think of you everyday! Gods will be done. You are all so loved and there is a team of prayer warriors here,there and everywhere! We love you all lots! Ty, Janell and Rainy Neevel

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  11. Karl & Jennifer ThoeneApril 20, 2010 at 8:20 AM

    Jack and Wendi,
    We are praying for Cash and you and that God continues to guide the doctors as they care for Cash. Stay strong on your journey. May God continue to bless you all. With Love,
    Karl, Jen and the girls

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  12. My heart breaks for you....lots of prayers on your behalf.

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  13. The Parriera Family...
    Prayers to you all throughout this rough time. I know that God is in control and when one door closes another opens...my prayer is that you can rest assured Cash is in God's hands no matter what. Take care of yourselves and enjoy your precious gift from God...
    Love,
    Brandon & Kari Mulder

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  14. Jack and Wendi,
    I just discovered your blog and rest assured that you and your family will be in Jenny and my prayers. May God grant healing to your son Cash.

    Jim Van Ry
    Creede, CO

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  15. Jack and Wendi,
    Our women's Bible Study has been carefully following your blog and praying for you. Judy M. and Linda H. are keeping us posted, as moms of your sisters in law. Praying that you will feel those prayers and experience the very arms and heart of Jesus in those around you right now. We are honored to be part of the great host of people praying for you right now!
    Joan & Rick Vander Giessen

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  16. Jack and Wendi,
    We are praying for your family.
    Rusty and Lynette Polinder

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  17. Hi guys...

    Praying God's strength for you with this unexpected news. But, GOD IS BIGGER THAN CANCER!!! YEAH!! All the verses that came to my mind have been quoted above, hold tight to those scriptures and know you are loved, prayed for and thought of each day.

    Troy and Terra

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  18. I don't know you, but I'm praying for Cash and your whole family. I've heard about you through Willie King, via Christians @ Microsoft. May Jesus hold you all in his mighty arms, and may Cash get well!

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  19. God is great, God is good, let us thank Him...
    Why this childhood prayer for meals is the first thing to jump into my head while I sit here crying at this news is a mystery to me.

    God is great, God is good, let us thank Him.
    Oh dear God, please, and thank you.

    Ruth and Ed

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  20. Jack & Wendi - I just got the link to this from Sharon Barr-Jeffrey's FB page... I am so very sad to hear your news...

    Though we've lost touch since our shared years at SPU, know that we are praying for Cash's miraculous healing!

    In Christ,
    Laura Partridge Lympus

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